I Love You, From Mollie

And just like that- 2023 is over.  It was a year full of joy, love, self-realization, fulfillment, curiosity, fear, and nostalgia. For the first time probably ever, the dawn of a new year makes me scared. I want to hold onto my friends in their little spaces in my life forever. I want to further my career but I also want to stay a kid. I want to explore new places and new friendships but I fear the unknown. I want to know... When do you start feeling like an adult? When do you know you have adult money? When do you feel confident to handle adult problems like taxes, car registration, retirement plans, career development and all of those things? The future scares me. But my love for art, Earth, and most especially - my family - keeps me grounded. The dawn of a new year may scare me but the dawn of new growth and love for my siblings, parents, uncles and grandparents doesn't.  My boyfriend met my grandparents (Momo and TC) the other day and it meant the world to me. He talked about e

I am alone in Germany for about 2 weeks, no access to a computer, but I want to keep track of my journey and thoughts along the way. [Ill give more context later] The mobile app won’t let me add photos but I’ll share a bunch when I get home.  Here’s my silly story for today:  So in Germany they offer a free service group called foodshare where local stores donate their broken/ damaged/ expired goods to a community group that gets together every week to take it out of their hands. People come with boxes and bins to collect items and then use them as they want. This evening, my aunt went out to get groceries from the group and came back with snacks, shampoo, bread, pastries, and berries. To prepare the berries, I was washing them and placing them in Tupperware for tomorrow. My aunt [Tabea] told me to compost the bad ones- so I was feeling the strawberries and giving her the good ones to cut.  A lot of them were soft so a lot of them were thrown away. She asked me, “why are you throwing a

Want to read my story and the stories of other cancer survivors? Check out this link:   https://www.lls.org/story/mollie

 Dear mom, H A P P Y M O T H E R 'S D A Y ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !  I hope you have a lovely day and treat yourself! Go on a gorgeous hike, treat yourself to an ice cold brew, you know how it is– classic. I love you! From, Mollie

Today I attended a zoom call with 150 other cancer survivors and patients in remission to celebrate our scholarship (!!!!) through LLS. LLS stands for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society and it has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. I remember attending event and fundraisers as a little kid, most notably: Light the Night Walk. Light the Night Walk is an event that takes place all across the United States where families and children, doctors, friends and supporters gather together to walk to end cancer. It's a celebration! There's music and matching t-shirts and little red lanterns that bobble in people's hands and light up the night.  As a matter of fact, I attended my first Light the Night walk in San Diego during the first quarter of the school year. Shyly, not having many friends on campus yet, I asked my neighbor Clark if he wanted to take the trolley to the city and go with me. He didn't know what it was, what it meant to me, or my experience with

 Hi Mom, I got my blood drawn for work today! It didn't go as smoothly as I hoped for...  The nurse couldn't find my veins so she tried my left arm,                                                   no blood. I was extremely nervous and asked her to take it out so she moved me to another room, gave me a moment, and tried my right. I painstakingly sat there for what felt like forever but FINALLY some blood came out.  What was the trick?                                                 Apple juice.  She gave me some apple juice to chug after moving me to the second room and I guess it did the trick!  An apple a day really does keep the doctor away. 🍎🍏🍎🍏 I'm glad they were finally able to get the sample but I wish I didn't get this nervous for blood tests. To think that I used to do this constantly under treatment is astounding! I wish you were with me to squeeze my hand and relieve some nerves but I guess going to the doctors by yourself is just a part of growing up. 

Mom, I used to get SO ANGRY when we would go to the beach or go camping or on a hike, and you would say,                "Mollie, wear a hat!"                           "Mollie, cover your head!"             Why do I have to cover my head , I would think, as Lucy and Liam ran about, with their twinning bright blonde heads sticking out like a sore thumb, swaying in the wind, and reflecting the light of the sun. Why me!!! It's not my fault that I got cancer and they didn't. Well, you'll be happy to know though reluctant as I was, I still wear hats even when you're not around to see me.  You were right. I'll never live a completely carefree life. Even when I come down with a common cold or what we call the "frat flu" at school, I'm used to my nurses and doctors jumping to conclusions about the state of my health because of my past with Leukemia.   Though chemotherapy has its health drawbacks, the gratitude that I feel to be alive and w